"Toning" shoes are a scam! Duh!

A pair of unstable sneakers will not strengthen your core, will not firm up your butt and will not help you lose weight. That's what the Federal Trade Commission (FTC) said, so take those "Shape Up" shoes off before you fall on your ass and hurt yourself.

The FTC, the agency in charge of protecting consumers, on May 16 announced that Skechers USA Inc., the company that makes the Shape Up shoes, agreed to pay $40 million to settle charges that the company deceived consumers by making unfounded claims that Shape-ups would help people lose weight, and strengthen and tone their butt, legs and abs.

But the best part is that the FTC also says that the consumers who bought these “toning” shoes will be eligible for refunds either directly from the FTC or through a court-approved class action lawsuit, and can submit a claim here.

I'm not surprised that a corporation deceived consumers. That happens every single day, unfortunately. What boggles my mind is that people will buy anything that promises an easy solution.

And buy they did. Skechers was the market leader in the toning footwear category, with sales peaking in 2010 at close to $1 billion, according to the FTC. Shape-up fitness shoes, which Skechers introduced in April 2009, cost consumers about $100 a pair. Resistance Runner, Toners, and Tone-ups became available in mid-2010, and retailed for $60 to $100 a pair, the FTC says.

Industry wide sales for these shoes are expected to increase to $1.5 billion this year. People keep buying them even though they don't work.

When I first saw the ads for the Shape Ups I thought of twisted ankles, busted knees and hip replacements. Well, call me psychic! They're an ambulance chaser's dream!

According to an article from San Diego's 10news.com, more than 60 people are being represented by a San Diego law firm in a mass tort case against shoe maker Skechers, with 49 others waiting to join the suit.

Among the injuries the so-called "toning" shoes are claimed to have caused are head trauma, broken hips, broken femurs, broken ankles and even brain injury in one case. And this is only one of many lawsuits out there.

To all those who bought the wobbly shoes: I hope you learned your lesson without getting hurt in the process. Now go get your money back.

Taking badassness to the next level with CrossFit

(Yeah, I know that "badassness" is not really a word, but if Sarah Palin can make words up, so can I.)

After completing at-home fitness programs P90X, P90X +, Insanity, and George St. Pierre's Rushfit, I gained strength, stamina and an unwavering passion for fitness. These excellent programs helped me get in the best shape of my life.

But after about two years of completing these programs and then mixing them up for variety, I became pretty bored of working out at home (or at the park) all by myself. I tried to get my friends to join me, but they weren't up for the challenge. I needed something to make working out fun and exciting again.

Enter CrossFit. I have been reading about CrossFit since I began doing P90X in 2010. I always thought it looked pretty cool. But I decided to continue working out at home.

Good thing I did. CrossFit's free introductory class would have left me crying for my mommy had I not worked on gaining strength and stamina first.

Even with all the strength I had gained, that intro class left me sore for three days. It shocked me that only about 10 minutes of Tabata squats and push ups and a little monkeying around on the parallettes would beat me up so much. (With the Tabata method, you do maximum repetitions for 20 seconds and rest for 10. You repeat that sequence eight times per exercise.)

As John (then also "Cougar") Mellencamp would say, "it hurt so good!!" I was officially hooked on CrossFit.

Today I went to my first Elements (foundations) class at CrossFit. Our coach, Jason, taught us how to perform push ups, sit ups and squats. We also tried our hand at pull ups, but thankfully those weren't part of the Tabata sequence. A few hours later, I'm still not feeling sore, but I know it's coming.

The only downside of CrossFit is that it's really expensive. Here in New York City every "box" (as CrossFitters call their gyms), charges about $300 for two weeks of Elements and two weeks of as many WODs (workouts of the day) as you want to put yourself through. Then, it's either $20 per class or $200 a month.

Someday, when I open my own box, I won't charge so much. Until then, I'll be poor, but badass.